Chapter Text
Gale helped Lena as she dissected the phase spider monarch’s corpse; removing legs, tying off the web sacs and the poison sacks, extracting a third larger glowing chitinous organ from within its abdomen, the ‘roe,’ as well as a robe somehow tucked in between the cephalothorax and the abdomen.
“How did this get here?” Lena asked, handing the crusty yet otherwise interact robe over the Gale to examine.
“From my experience dungeon delving, you can find many strange things mostly in the creatures because they’ve eaten another adventurer; most magical items will remain intact but lodged in the stomach for quite a long time before showing signs of deterioration.” Gale muttered a short incantation that cleaned the robe, revealing a spider web pattern.
Lena shot him a puzzled look. “So how long is ‘long?’” She had managed to slice the chitin covering the abdomen into segments about two yards long and a yard wide and started scraping the gore off of the interior, flicking the gunk away from them.
“I would guess up to a century, depending on the creatures’ lifespan. Most creatures large enough to consume the adventurer whole can ‘stow’ large magical items in their stomachs without suffering ill effects.” He cast a few more incantations over the robe, causing it to glow briefly each time. “I do believe we have a poisoner’s robe.”
“What’s it do?”
“Magic users who wear it are immune to poisonings, and should they cast spells intending to poison their targets will find them more potent.” He looked over at the flensed translucent chitin panels Lena began stowing. “What do you intend to do with those?”
“Chitin is supposed to pretty strong for its weight, so I figure we can take these panels and the webbing sacs over to that tiefling blacksmith Wyll mentioned and see if they can make armor out of it.” Lena began looked over the spider’s eyes and picked one off to reveal a clear magnifying lens. She handed the lens over and began removing another. “What do think? Useful?”
Gale cast a few more spells over it. “I do believe these can see through invisibility.”
"I suppose I should go back to the other carcasses and collect their lenses, though how do you manage to see if you're invisible?" Lena asked.
Before Gale could answer, Wyll called them over to an alcove where he held up a small tome. “I found something interesting about our spider matriarch,” he said as Gale and Lena approached. “Looks like she was a high elf who was enslaved by some drow followers of Lolth and became a follower, then a fanatic.” He pointed to a smeared diagram in the book he held open. “From what I can read, these are for a ritual to turn herself into a spider.”
“Fascinating. We found a robe that may have belonged to her,” Gale said as Wyll handed him the book.
Lena looked into her bawbag and took out a spider leg. “Should I feel bad that I’m planning on cooking these up with dinner tonight?”
Wyll looked at the spider leg and started to turn a little green, while Gale pinched the bridge of his nose with his free hand and sighed. “No, I don’t imagine our former high elf managed to retain enough intelligence after her transformation for you to suffer any undue moral distress about eating parts of her, or her brood.” He looked down at the page. “It looks like the ritual was meant to be permanent.”
Lena nodded and stowed the leg again.
“You’re really planning on eating those?” Wyll asked.
“Yeah.” Lena pointed at her chest. “Honey badger, remember? We eat pretty much everything that crawls, flies, slithers, runs, or swims. And that includes arachnids like spiders and scorpions. And spiders taste like crab.” She gave Wyll a fang-filled grin.
Wyll ran out the alcove and began to retch when Astarion appeared. “What’s wrong with Wyll?”
“Lena gave him a short primer on the dietary limits of honey badgers; or rather, the lack thereof,” Gale explained.
“Ah." Astarion's eyes darkened and his lips flattened. "I’m guessing that those spider legs you’ve been gathering aren’t merely for some sort of bizarre crafting project,” he said in a clipped voice.
“No, they’re dinner for anyone willing to eat ‘em,” Lena replied.
“I think I shall pass,” Astarion said.
Lena and Gale looked at him with mild surprise. “I wasn't expecting you to because I didn’t think you could eat solids,” Lena remarked. "I suppose you could suck out the hemolymph, but you mentioned that 'higher' animals seem to sustain you more.
“No, I might have to stay in my tent if you eat those anywhere near me. I neither want to see nor hear you when you eat those." Astarion saw the questions and concerns in his companions' eyes and felt the need to explain. He gave himself a moment to compose himself before speaking again. "My master would only occasionally allow me to feed, but only from the things he would allow me and nothing else. He would play games, asking if I wanted to feed from the people I brought him, and if I said yes, he would have me flogged or I would be compelled to flog myself. And if I said no, he would fling a putrid rat toward me, and I would have to bow and scrape in gratitude before I was allowed to eat. The burning need for blood would get so strong that I would resort to insects I could scavenge when he wasn't looking.”
"Do you want me to not eat them?” she asked.
"No." He sighed. "I know it's not fair to you, but it's very stomach-churning to me."
Gale and Lena went silent, and Lena gave him a tentative pat on the shoulder. “Need a hug?” she asked.
Astarion looked taken aback. ‘What? No! I don’t need a hug!” He looked at Lena’s concerned expression and debated with himself before he finally relented. “Okay, fine.”
She gave him a bear hug, holding him until she felt him relax and return her embrace. After a while, he sighed. “Thank you,” he whispered.
“You remember my promise: I will fight that sh*t stain who calls himself your master. Even if I die, I will make him hurt,” she said quietly. She felt him nod and let go.
Astarion straightened himself and cleared his throat before noticing Gale looking at them curiously. “I’ll leave Lena to explain,” he said and he walked away.
He approached Lena. “May I inquire what that was about?”
Lena’s lips pinched. “Remember what the hag was saying to Astarion about his master before I cracked her skull open like a coconut?”
“I admit that I only vaguely remember: she took me off guard with her revelations about me. But I have a sense it was crude and terrible,” Gale said.
“His master had been compelling him into a sort of prostitution to lure victims into becoming meals. I refuse to ask him for details until he’s ready to tell me—if ever—but I won’t allow his master to continue abusing him or anyone else,” she said, her voice tinged with determination. Gale gathered her into a tight embrace, which she returned. “You aren’t jealous, are you?”
“Not really, though I wonder if you would fight for me as fiercely as you would for Astarion,” Gale admitted.
“Vampires seem doable because I've read or heard so many stories at home about how to kill them that I figured a few of them might be true, but how do you fight a goddess? How do you make a goddess feel any remorse or stop them from hurting her own followers?”
"I don't quite understand why you feel such animosity toward my goddess, given this predicament was my own doing; pushing her into allowing me to explore the Outer Plane, and then trying to get back into her good graces with what turned out to be the orb."
"But why did she show you the Outer Plane to begin with? Or for that matter, why go from teacher to lover? Can't she find another god, or better yet a mystic dild* to fill those needs?" Lena asked.
Gale choked a bit. "That was a visual I wasn't sure I wanted."
Lena held him tighter. "If I could put her on a 'sexual offenders' list and have her pay reparations I would. Or beat the sh*t out of her. Beating the sh*t out of her would be so satisfying, but she's a f*cking deity and I don't know what to do."
Gale gave the side of Lena’s head a kiss as she breathed in his library scent. She turned to look into his warm brown eyes and she felt her lips part when—
“Has anyone seen Lae’zel?” Shadowheart called from outside the alcove.
Gale and Lena’s shoulders drooped. “And the moment has passed,” Lena said.
Shadowheart popped her head in. “Oh good, you haven’t caused Gale to explode.”
“Not yet,” Gale muttered. Lena buried her head into the crook of his neck and giggled.
Shadowheart rolled her eyes. “You know what I mean. And this isn’t the time or place to engage in sex.” She looked around the filthy alcove and frowned. “Though I would seriously question your tastes if you tried in here. One of you is bound to catch something.”
Gale cleared his throat. “So you were saying about Lae’zel?”
“I will assume that neither of you have seen her since she nearly got herself killed with those spiderlings.”
Lena sighed and moved away from Gale. “We’ll help look for her. She’s probably annoyed that she didn’t nearly get herself killed earlier on those other spiders.” She and Gale headed toward Shadowheart and joined in the search.
---
Shadowheart climbed a rope that connected to a well in the center of the village and found Lae’zel sitting on a log nearby.
“Where were you?” Shadowheart demanded. “You disappeared on us after killing the spider matriarch.”
“Are you here to gloat over how I nearly died from those mere spiderlings?” Lae’zel spat.
“No, I’m here to scold you for leaving us, especially because you refused to let me heal your wounds.”
Lae’zel opened her arms and gestured to herself. “As you can see, I am fine, istik.”
“But you still shouldn’t have left and for so long.”
“Worried that I wasn’t looting enough for your tastes?” Lae’zel sneered.
She sat down next Lae’zel. “Are you upset that you nearly got killed by doing exactly what I warned you not to do?”
“I am a warrior of Creche K’liir.” Lae’zel snarled. “I should not have been so injured by such small prey.”
“There were so very many of them. And they crawled all over you before you could strike. There’s no shame to being overwhelmed, especially since you were the one who dealt the death-blow to the matriarch,” Shadowheart said softly.
Lae’zel stared out in front of her. “I do not like feeling weak,” she admitted.
“No one said you were.” She sat quietly with Lae’zel until they heard Wyll call for them.
“Oh good, you found her,” he said slightly out of breath.
“As you can see I am well,” Lae’zel replied.
Wyll turned back to where he came and shouted, “FOUND THEM!”
In the distance, they could hear Astarion shout, “WYLL’S FOUND THEM!”
From even further away, they heard Lena bellow, “GOOD!”
Shadowheart groaned and stood. “Come on, Lae’zel. Let’s get back or we’ll never hear the end of it.”
